Hide-and-Seek in the Facebook Universe

Now Facebook allows you to hide what you write, hide when you’re online—soon they’ll have an app for how to hide your existence in toto. Let’s take this to its logical conclusion, shall we?

 

As we enter the Facebook Universe (“F. U.,” for short), Scott has a discussion going on his wall regarding a political matter he doesn’t know much about, really, but it is Friday afternoon and he’s bored at work. 

Scott has a lot of friends (most of whom he would not recognize on the street; they are mainly friends⁷ (friends of friends of friends of friends of friends of friends of friends).

But Scott has a few “friend-friends” (actual friends, as opposed to extended friends, one of the ever-increasing categories F. U. provides; enterprising types are preparing business cards, as we speak, to organize the complex F. U. for you). Among these friends are:

a. Debbie, who has been hiding from Joe because they dated for a while and
then, well--

b. Bob, who has been hiding from Debbie because he wanted to date her while she was dating Joe and assumed once things went south with Joe she would notice him and, well--

We now join the discussion in progress.

Debbie says a few words, which everyone but Joe can see.

Scott responds to Debbie, but calls her “Honey” instead of using her name.
 

Joe chimes in and, not knowing Debbie is present, makes a remark in response to something Scott said that references her in a negative way.

Theme music from “The Twilight Zone” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Twilight_Zone begins to play.

Bob sees what Debbie wrote to Scott and takes the opportunity to add his two cents about Debbie. His remarks are invisible to her.

Debbie says some things in response to the partial conversation she can see.

Bob comes back with another zinger.

Scott tries to find a way to respond to the exchange.

Both Debbie and Bob are offended.

The remaining people who have tuned in grab a beer and wait to see what happens next. Or they decide maybe they’ve had too many beers and that’s why this all looks so bizarre.

Scott walks into the kitchen and says to his wife, “People on Facebook are nuts.” She says, “Shhh. I’m watching Harvey.” http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0042546/

Folks, don’t let this happen to you. No matter how easy Facebook seems to
make it.

©2012 Laynie Tzena.